Saturday, June 28, 2008

Moving On ...


This is such a beautiful place in Dubai that I just have to stick it here ... even though I am now back home in KL, Malaysia ... I have just collected the keys to my new apartment (my first ever purchase) yesterday ... and I learnt all about the rights to get minor defects fixed! Thank goodness for helpful parents who have experience in such matters as I am generally non-confrontational ...
Anyway the title of this posting is moving on ... and that's precisely what I have decided upon ... something happened to me in 1998/ 1999 ... and no it is not the worldwide crumbling recession ... since then I have said no more regrets ... and recently over the past 12 months ... I guess I got swept up in the hysteria of making more $$$ ... I was surrounded by people who had clear objectives and needs and they are so driven ... so when I compare myself to them (never a wise thing to do), I realized that though I am capable of so much more, I have been an underachiever never going out to tax my mental capabilities or physical abilities much ... not that I have a terrible life, mind you
So I went overboard always looking for the next job that pays more and more and more ... forgetting my principle of no-regrets ... the truth is that we have one life to live ... and while working, we must ensure that we enjoy doing what we do ... then at the end of it all, it will have been a life worth living
Do I have regrets going to Dubai? No. It's not the job that I will remember 20 years from now ... although I may recall being employed there ... but what I will remember most are the people I met along the way ... the people who matters ... and here is a quick roll call (I may missed some ... please don't get mad!):
Carlos & Chung - my first friends from our days staying in Nuran - they are the people I call up to chat when something pisses me off at work - always important to have folks who are there for you when you move to a new place
Dang - a genuine brilliant chap who goes out of his way to share what he has with people
She Chen - she makes the phrase a small world really real. We come from the same neighbourhood, in the same state in the same country of the same age group and working for the same company in Dubai. How about that, eh? And best of all, she has a patient ear for all my unending tirades against the ills of the world. HAH!
Laur - who learnt a thing or two about what it means to be non-judgmental to the people around you. I am glad you are able to see and value my contribution to your working life however brief it may be
So although some unpleasant things happened, yet for all these relationships, I am so glad I was in Dubai ... ummm I may still be in Dubai or I may not ... but for the rest of my life, I am grateful for this brief interlude ... otherwise I will never have the opportunity to meet these wonderful people ... and my life will be a little less bright for that. I may move on to elsewhere but you guys and gals are always welcome in my life
(I decided not to rant my frustrations here after all ... hehehe!)

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Stream of Consciousness



Too many serious blog posts ... this is something different ... typing anything that is on my mental plate now ... kind of like bloody psychologist shit ... know what I mean?

My parents are going to Singapore this weekend ... finally ... meet my dad's other relatives ... I am here in dynamic Dubai ... hear that you beautiful Bahrain people? Dubai = Dynamic ... Bahrain = Beautiful ... Manama = Magnificent ... Me = Pathetic ... thanks!

I am flying home 19th June via Sri Lankan airways ... Going to Bangkok for a couple of nights ... then back home with some friends for a couple of nights ... then parents n clearing of stuff for another couple of nights ... then back to Dubai again ... sigh! I LOVE to be on the move ... I need a break after my break ...

Sex & The City is in the cinemas ... Indy Jone 4 was on a few weeks ago ... more of the same ... good same though ... Why does Jet Li's voice sound so odd when he speaks English? ALmost like someone else ...

Reading a ton of comics ... Mile High shipment came through ... no novels for 2 weeks now ... rot my brains ... to all those I converted to comics ... sorry ... not really ... there are some amazing stuff out there ... try Moonshadow (about a kid whose mom was a 60s hippy and got impregnated by a globe of light ... I kid you not this is the true storyline) ... Books of Magic ... a serious take on Harry Potter ... came out in the early 90s ... first 75 issues were dead brilliant .. British kid with potential to be greatest magician on earth ... everyone after him ... Or Sandman ... about 7 ... I don't know what ... representing different aspects of reality ... Sandman, Destiny, Dream, Delirium, Desire, Despair, Destruction ... good stuff ...

I am NOT trying to be arty farty

Feeling guilty ... should be working on my own novel or artwork ... procrastination ... I am champ! Same shit with those old world diaries ... and every time I will buy a new book ... every time I said I will keep at it .... hahhahahaha ... 20 years .. not once successful!

Having another bout of gout attack ... never gonna be successful at weight loss ... damn! Go wikipedia ... check it out ... what gout is ... TB is contagious ... scary shit too ...

Depression coming ... hope it won't last more than a few minutes ... I need a COCA COLA ... no zero, no light ... just sugar bomb me! Yeah ... gotta go buy one now ... damn it ... I am so full ... glutton ... gluttony is a sin right?

This is all rubbish this post ... if you are reading this, it means I have wasted a chunk of your life ... something that is gone forever ... time ... sigh ... sorry ... I will end this post here ... now ... next one is better ... promise ...

Thursday, June 5, 2008

Death


Why is the title DEATH? Because I wish to share this piece of really personal news with everyone who will eventually drop by and read ... some day ... and even if no one ... well that's fine.
Since I came to Dubai, I got to know a wonderful person who coincidentally works in the same company as I and is from the same country, state, home town and neighbourhood where I grew up ... Pulau Tikus, Pulau Pinang, Malaysia. If this isn't a small world, then I don't know what is. Anyway ... she went home for a well deserved vacation last month. A couple of weeks ago, she received the disturbing news that her grandma is not doing so well. So she rushed home to be with the grandma. Originally it was meant to be this past Monday but due to ticketing she left on Tuesday reaching home Wednesday. Today she sms me that grandma has passed away. I don't know the dear old lady ... but I still feel for my friend ... at least her grandma fought to the last bit waiting for her to be home before letting go ...
And this got me to thinking once again that life is so fleeting. We never know when it ends. Sometimes we are afraid to try things, to do what our heart yearns for ... instead we keep on delaying, procrastinating ... how many of us have read those chain emails about the friend who lost touch ... and when he has his best friend's phone number ... decided not to disturb ... waiting for another day ... and when he finally called ... he found out his friend had just passed away?
Well, that is true. Life is unexpected. We never know the number of years we all have. So to all of you out there, try to live your life ... to the max. Plan for the future, yes, but also live for the present. Remember lessons from the past but do not let the past scare you from acting in the present
HAVE AN APPETITE FOR THIS LIFE YOU HAVE BEEN BLESSED WITH
I know this sadness since last year ... when a friend I know since 2000 ... I lost touch with in 2004 ... late last year ... we contacted each other through friendster ... we chatted on line and exchange emails ... and we are planning to meet up end of last year or early this year ... only to my surprise ... after Christmas I received a note on my friendster ... that this friend had passed away! I thought the sender was nasty ... I replied that she shouldn't send such messages. She told me to verify with anyone else I may know. So I did. I sms a mutual friend who checked and to our surprise she passed away on Christmas day. She is in her early 40s, slim, energetic with a young daughter. It was a shock to all of us who knew her. I wish I could say I knew her well. The truth is I didn't. But for all that I know of her, I treasured her honesty and integrity best of all. And I value the friendship we shared, those precious moments
Although I am saddened that we never kept in touch more ... I am at least thankful for the past 3 months of contact ... I learnt a lot from this woman ... in her life and in her death ... and for that I am grateful
May God bless you always, Yap Lai Choo!